Vent

I just want to run away from my life right now. I am so stressed and I don't get very much help. I am with my kids 24/7. I am the one that gets up with them and puts them to bed. I am the one who changes bums and tries to potty train. I am the one who cleans the house and yes it is not perfect but if some were to stop by I could let them in with out thinking "what are they thinking about this mess". Brian wants it perfect all the time but is not home enough to see that that can not happen. I can't take care of my kids, play with them, read to them, or give them what they not if I am cleaning all the time so the house is perfect. This is the cleanest house we have ever lived in (even as kids), But he wants it spot less all the time. I also can't take care of the kids if I am not taking care of myself. I find myself staying up half the night because I like the quiet time. I have told Brian many times that I need time without the kids. I even take grocery shopping as an outing without the kids as a great time. But then I come home and he is mad that I took to long. I finally asked him why he does that. His answer "well if I knew where the diapers, the wipes, extra clothes and food then I wouldn't be mad that you were gone so long. My answer "diaper are in the bottom drawer of Kari's, wipes are in the white box in the living room, extra diaper wipes are in the same drawer with the diapers, clothes HAVE YOU LOOKED IN THEIR CLOSET OR THEIR DRESSER, food in the fridge,pantry and the freeze." His answer was not the last time. The last time I feed Brax before I left and I changed him and I took Kari.
I am thinking about just leaving this weekend now that he KNOWS where everything is.
I would also like 2 hours in my scraproom without him needing help with the kids.